💔 In love, know what you want! According to a study, romantic ambiguity could harm your well-being

Single people who are dating without having a clear idea of what they are looking for in a relationship feel lonelier and are less satisfied with their lives. This is what a study from McGill University reveals.

The team conducted two complementary studies involving over 180 young, single adults actively seeking a soulmate. As part of these studies, the scientists examined the links between "relationship clarity", loneliness, and life satisfaction. The concept of relationship clarity – a clear understanding of what one wants from a relationship – was developed by Dita Kubin, co-author of the paper and a recent PhD graduate in psychology from McGill University.


In the first study, the scientists asked participants to reflect on their current dating experiences and to fill out questionnaires measuring their relationship clarity, their feeling of loneliness, and their life satisfaction. In the second, the team assessed another group of single people using the same tools, and followed them for two months.

Lack of clarity and incompatible partners

"The repeated measures taken as part of our second study reinforce our belief that it is the lack of relationship clarity that leads to loneliness, and not the other way around," explains Katya Kredl, a PhD student in psychology and lead author of the paper.

According to the research team, several explanations can shed light on this finding.

"People with low relationship clarity might be less selective in their dating, which could lead to unsatisfying experiences with incompatible partners," details Katya Kredl. "Furthermore, the lack of clarity could lead these individuals to interpret ambiguous signals negatively during their dates. When one feels uncertain in a social situation, they are more likely to perceive neutral signals as rejection, which reinforces the feeling of loneliness."

The team also validated the concept of relationship clarity by conducting additional studies, which allowed them to compare the concept to related notions, such as satisfaction with being single. According to Katya Kredl, this work confirmed that the relationship clarity scale indeed measures something new and distinct.

Loneliness, a global issue

Katya Kredl points out that approximately 50% of Canadians and Americans have reported feeling lonely in recent years, according to government data. Loneliness is furthermore associated with various mental and physical health problems.

Since romantic relationships often constitute an essential form of social support, previous research has shown that single people who feel lonelier and less socially supported also report lower levels of satisfaction and well-being.

Katya Kredl hopes that the benefits of relationship clarity can help improve the well-being of single people.

"In the future, we would like to design an intervention technique aimed at helping people clarify their relationship goals," she adds.